Douchebags will replace sick bags on aircrafts
Virgin Atlantic has been researching the method of using douchebags in it’s fleet for quite some time now.
Douchebags will replace the current sick bags and Virgin has come to the conclusion that it will provide more comfort to the infrequent traveller.
Science reports have statistically shown that douchebags are capable of taking more crap than conventional paper bags.
The switch to douchebags is starting as of now and will be completed as soon as Virgin finishes negotiations with it’s primary supplier FOX News about quality standards.
Local tanning shops have been investigated as alternative resource.
Charles Frost @ March 20, 2008
The switch seems to go live sooner than expected as Virgin recruiters (the “Douchebag-Hunters”) have recently been spotted in numerous fitness studios all over Europe’s capital cities.
This apparently has lead to a tough competition among the Douches, who mostly consider such an employment as the ultimate fulfillment of their dreams since it finally places them where they truly belong - above all others.